Tree of Life Mothering

For your Sunday inspiration. I really like it. I am not smart enough to understand it all the first time but it makes my brain stretch. Be sure to use the pause button to read everything on the screen before it changes. It is a transcript of two men, Mortimer Adler and William F. Buckley, discussing how to think about God.

Last night my dh and 16 year old daughter and I attended the GWU seminar about “Unlocking the Door to the Great Conversation,” presented by Audrey Rindlisbacher, who owns the http://tenboominstitute.com. The information was so enlightening and edifying. I got to see a friend who used to come to our Veggie Gals potlucks over seven years ago.  More on a recap of the seminar and my joyful reunion later!

Audrey said she is conducting a free teleconference call on The Hunger Games this coming Tuesday. So to get a feel for Audrey’s opinion I asked her what she thought of Harry Potter and Twilight. She said that she didn’t like Twilight because the books got progressively darker. About Harry Potter, she said that she had three objections: 1. The author uses the same old, unoriginal theme of no parents, no family. Heaven forbid we should have a family structure! 2. The characters are always breaking rules and getting away with it. 3. The books, like Twilight, got darker. It sounds like I can trust Audrey’s opinion so I am eager to hear what she has to say about The Hunger Games. Come join us for the call!

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“Mommy, what is fast food?” asked my six year old girl today. Yes, it is possible to raise little children innocent of McDonalds, Taco Bell, and Burger King. I’m proud to say my three youngest have never set foot under the Golden Arches. The middle two went there with a relative, unbeknownst to me, on a road trip two summers ago, and the oldest two have been there more often. Kids get older and sometimes they are with friends and their friends want to go there. If you haven’t been converted from going there, please read the above pictured book. It will reveal the dark side to you.

I had to laugh when I watched this video. It reminds of something I heard Dr, Jay Gordon MD, say at a conference I attended. He called McDonalds and other fast food places that give colorful, cartoon iconic toys with junk food to children, “nutritional pedophiles.” What a way of saying it! This video comes from Sarah Pope, over at http://thehealthyhomeeconomist.com. I have to giver her credit for calling the food like it is! But I don’t even want to pay for the toy, I just tell my kids the food is bad for you.

That’s the power moms have over young children’s minds. We can brainwash them to only want goodness and wholesomeness! So go shape some toddler’s mind today! I wonder if the same thing would work if we did it with video games when they are 2.

The time has come. I have been wondering what I would do about this for over a decade. Valor is working on filling out his missionary application. I’ve always known that he would need to be vaccinated if he wants to go overseas. If he doesn’t want to be, he can get a call to the States. What to do? We stopped vaccinating our children when Valor was 2, after his sister was born and I studied the issue. My eyes were opened to so many risks that are greater, to me, than not vaccinating. I decided that until I could be convinced of the safety and purity of vaccines (I learned of the toxic soup that vaccines are in which pose significant risks) that I would wait on vaccinating my children. I’m still waiting.

So here we are. I have heard from different friends that you can take homeopathic vaccinations but now I can’t remember who told me this. Where do we get those? Sarah Pope, over here, says you can use Nosodes homeopathics which are simply the germ of the disease, and not the toxic soup, but the drawback is the effect lasts only a few weeks, long enough for a trip, but not a two-year mission. (By the way, I really like Sarah’s summary of the vaccine debate in the afore-mentioned blog post. She perfectly captures my thoughts. As she says, it is not a black and white issue like the doctors and pharma industry make it out to be. The whole issue has a lot of gray!)

Here’s what the Green Smoothie Girl’s mom did. http://blog.greensmoothiegirl.com/2010/06/24/vaccines-part-3-of-4/ Her mother wanted go to on a mission to Italy. She was able to find some vaccines that didn’t have all the junk in them and got them. Later, when getting a thermogram instead of a mammogram she found out from a naturopath doctor in Bountiful, Dr. Marietta Bergdorf, that Utah law says the LDS church can’t discriminate calling someone on a mission based on their vaccinations. Dr. Bergdorf has a son on a mission in Switzerland who got around getting shots this way.  Hmmm…interesting news! What will we do?

Those of you with missionary sons and daughters, what have you done? Those of you who don’t, have any of you thought it completely through and have a plan in place for when you do?

I am so excited about this! 3 Key Elements is putting on a Master’s of Influence: Teacher’s Edition event on Aug 2-3, from 9 AM to 6 PM in Salt Lake City.

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If you are a homeschooling mom, you might be interested. It will be geared to classroom teachers but as a homeschool mom you will benefit as well. You will learn about body language signs in children and what they mean, emotional intelligence, and what body language signs you might be doing that interfere with the message you want to communicate to your children. You will also have a lot of fun! I have been to a Master’s of Influence event before and had sooo much fun plus I learned a lot. I am still using what I learned everyday.

We had the privilege of having stake conference a few weeks ago at the Conference Center with Elder Holland, President Uchtdorf, and Elder Holland speaking. I will share what they said later if I find my notes. I do remember that Elder Holland said that the reason we have all these conferences and meetings is to change people. He said change comes from putting faith and action into the words we hear at these meetings. President Uchtdorf said it was OK to sleep in church, saying, “Church sleep is the healthiest.” He told us to relax, sit back and close our eyes if we want and even nap if desired.

Elder Holland called us all his neighbors since he used to live in Davis County for 20 of his “happiest years.” Since, he said, that Pres. Uchtdorf still lives in Davis County, (Bountiful) he said that that the Uchtdorfs had promised the Hollands visitation rights. Pres. Uchtdorf said that when they left Germany because of his call to be an apostle he and his wife settled in the “wild west” of Bountiful UT. It was fun to see them both so relaxed and personable.

After the meeting we got to walk through Temple Square to get to the car. It’s not every stake conference that we get to walk through Temple Square to go to the car! I found these lovely columbines above just begging me to photograph them.

We enjoyed looking at the handcart pioneer statue.

I have loved the past few Sundays because my oldest son was home with us, inbetween his first year of college ending and his new life for the summer, working in Provo for izeni.com. We had a fire in the fireplace on the last Sunday before Memorial Day because it was so chilly. I loved having everybody together for dinner and FHE. Nobody was whining or complaining or bossing or scolding. Yes, it seems like a rare moment. When he left he looked at the box of books he was leaving from his first year of college. He wistfully said, “I am going to miss those books!” That is music to my ears, as a homeschooling mom. I guess he figured he didn’t have room for them. So now I get to enjoy looking at them. Unfortunately I don’t think I will get to them this summer.

To add some inspiration for the evening last Sunday I shared two stories. The first was about a man who grew up in the RLDS Church but converted to the Church of Jesus Christ when he was a young man. I can’t find the URL for it but hope to find it soon. The next story was from one of my favorite bloggers, John Pontius. He tells two stories that are absolutely amazing about some strangers who came to his ward in Alaska. I won’t spoil the ending, you will have to go read it HERE

I would love to hear about any inspirational stories you hear or read on the Web. Please share below!

This is probably the most important book you will ever read, besides the scriptures. I know it’s hard to read the title on the cover, but the image from Goodreads.com was even worse. It is called Putting on the Armor of God by Steven Cramer. This book is the best book to read outside the scriptures because it helps you see how much satan wants to take you down, and how sneaky and unfair he is. He never sleeps. He is always plotting against you and everyone else. He does things to mess with your mind, and is so sneaky about it that if you aren’t educated about his tricks you never know.

He puts feelings in your heart and thoughts into your mind and unless you learn how he works, you won’t realize that it’s him, not you, that is the source of the ickies. You might give in to these bad feelings and thoughts and let them keep you from accomplishing all the good and wonderful acts of love, nobility, forgiveness, kindness, heroism, and generosity that Heavenly Father wants you to do. If you know how he works you can immediately shoo him away, saying, go away, I’m on to you! when he starts whispering bad things to your heart and head, instead of dwelling on the thoughts and feelings and spiraling downwards. What helps me with this is to remember what Oliver DeMille teaches in his book the Student Whisperer: the four negative voices are the Inner Critic, the Inner Judge, the Inner Rebel, and the Inner Victim. When I am feeling yucky, sometimes I remember to ask myself if I am fitting into one of those categories. If I am, then I know the feeling is from satan and I tell him to scram, that I am not listening any more.

When you know how subtle and sneaky satan is you will be motivated to know how to put on the full armor of God to protect yourself from his sinister and slimy ways. Another great resource is the interactive online book from Sons of Helamam that teaches you the brain chemistry that happens when satan puts bad feelings and thoughts in you. This book is by Maurice Harker, my friend Aneladee’s new boss. Maurice is an incredibly gifted man and mental health therapist who started The Sons of Helaman program to help LDS young men deal with pornography addictions. But the information is valuable to everyone, because all of us face battles with satan out to deceive us. 

My friend Michelle and I spent two hours last week discussing the first six chapters of the Putting on the Armor book. Maurice Harker recommends that his clients read it. It is written by an LDS man who I thank tremendously for taking the time to write this. It complements the online book that Maurice wrote very well. He connects scriptures and quotes from LDS Church leaders in a powerful, convincing way. He also tells stories of people who tell of hearing voices in their head or feelings and what they did about it, and what the consequence was. It is very helpful to read these stories and see documentation of satan whispering to people and the Holy Spirit and other righteous spirits whispering to people. ! I really liked the story of Elder Brigham Smoot, a missionary in the late 1800s who died and then came back to life because of a priesthood blessing. He remembers his spirit, outside his body, looking at the other missionaries around him trying to resuscitate his body. His spirit then spoke to one of the missionaries, telling him to administer a priesthood blessing on him. This other missionary remembers having the impression that he should administer the blessing. This story is given to illustrate that a spirit can speak to your spirit. satan is a spirit and he can speak to your spirit.

Everyone should know how to tell the difference between feelings that come from satan and his minions and those that come from God and his good, loyal helper spirits . I used to have a hard time accepting that satan can make someone feel some way. But even the scriptures show, as the author Steven Cramer demonstrates, that satan puts bad feelings and thoughts in people’s hearts and minds.

Michelle and I are going to return to a discussion of this book over the phone in a few weeks. Anyone want to join us? We can do it as a conference call on a summer weekday afternoon. If interested, please put comment below and indicate what day of the week would be best for you.

Here’s a bit about what Angie Baker said at the TJED Forum as the keynote speaker on May 5 at the Salt Palace. I almost feel as pleased about her speaking as I would if I were her mom. I have known Angie for a long time, before she hit it big in the TJED world. I actually knew her when we were both La Leche League Leaders for LLL of Utah, long ago. In my mind’s eye I can see her at her my girlfriend Joyce’s home, for a meeting of LLL of Utah Leaders, telling stories about nursing her toddler at night and helping a breastfeeding mom over the phone. 

Enough of the nostalgia, here’s a recap of what she said. She stated that when she was young she knew she wanted to grow up to do something great. She heard about men and women like Gandhi and Mother Teresa who were great and wanted to be like them. She defined a great soul as “a person with character and virtue who works to develop their God-given genius and uses it to bless humanity.”

http://video.ted.com/assets/player/swf/EmbedPlayer.swf

In the above video Sir Ken Robinson talks about how schools kill children’s creativity. 

She then quoted the Brit Sir Ken Robinson who wrote The Element. I thought it was cool that she quoted that book since my daughter and I got that book last fall for a self-directed scholar retreat that she attended for LEMI. (At the bottom of this post I have some more videos of Sir Robinson.) Here’s the quote:

Almost no one is asserting that one of the things education should aim to produce is children who have what Aristotle called a great soul.

She also shared a quote by a great church leader, David O. McKay, who said:

True education does not consist merely in the acquiring of a few facts of science, history, literature, or art, but in the development of character.

Then we got this gem of a quote from Einstein that Angie gave:

The world as we created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.

Then Angie went through the seven keys of TJED, adding her interpretation of each one.

1. Classics

Angie gave this quote from Arthur Henry King. If you don’t know AHK, you are missing out. He was educated at Cambridge. He became a famous British poet and writer. After he converted to the LDS Church, he came to Utah where he was a professor of English at BYU. He wrote a great book called Arm the Children: Faith’s Response to a Violent World that every TJED mom would salivate for. It has chunks of meaty thought on every page. Anyway, here is the quote:

Great literature helps us, as we are growing, to widen our world, from ourselves so that we can better choose what kind of person we are going to be. It helps us choose ourselves. In great art and literature, we can find what we ought to be, we can find our highest selves.

This is the best quote of all that Angie shared from a fellow homeschooling mom when Angie was just starting out. I shared a similar statement when I spoke at LDSHEA conference years ago:

If you can do nothing more than sit on the couch and read great classics to your kids, that is enough.

Angie said she discounted that at first but now she agrees. I do plenty of that at my house so I am glad to hear two more witnesses!

2. Mentors

Angie stated that mentors are great because they allow an individual to multiply his efforts. She said that one of the best ways to mentor your child is to lie in bed next to them at bedtime and let them talk.

3. Inspire not require.

Angie acknowledged that you do have to do require when it comes to chores, but she said, we can work at adding more inspiring in. I took that to mean we can add more inspiring into whatever we require, including chores, plus academics.

4. Structure time not content

Angie spoke about how important it is to set up time to study one subject in depth, instead of saying, “We will get done with this history textbook and then move on to something else.” She told the story of being in AP US History in high school. When it came to take the AP test, she didn’t have the confidence to fork out the money and take the test, because she felt her class had just glossed superficially over the subject, so she didn’t. Years later she is now a homeschooling mom studying history with her children, so she said now she has time to go study U.S. history deeply with her scholar youth and she enjoys it.

5. Quality not conformity

Angie declared that quality changes according to the age and stage of the child. She said that we should help the student ask, when determining quality, “What is the best for me to give?”

6. Simplicity not Complexity

Angie said that this simply means to read, write about, discuss, and apply the classics. She then added that you create the time to do these activities, that seem so simple yet can be so elusive, by minimizing the electronic distractions. She didn’t go into detail about how to do that at all. In every family that looks different but chances are you can do something to create more time to read a classic by cutting back on the screen time you enjoy and your family enjoys.

Angie said that she discovered the magic of having a chunk of time in the evening without electronic distractions when the power went out in their home and they spent an evening reading aloud from a classic.

7. You, not them

Angie shared what I have heard before, “I can’t give my children what I don’t have.” She then went on to say, “Your education is the hinge to open the door their education.” She pointed out how great it is to let them see you reading. She used to do all her studying before her kids woke up, in the early morning hours. Then one day she happened to read when her kids were awake and her daughter said, “Mom, you actually read books?!” So she realized how important it is to let them see her reading.

She told this story to share how important it is to have a background knowledge of classic books to help mentor your children’s education. After 9/11 her daughter asked her about the tragedy by saying, “Did God want this to happen?” Angie told her, “No, but sometimes people do bad things.” Then Angie read Uncle Tom’s Cabin and she was inspired to tell her daughter, “Jesus heals the hurts.” Angie stated, “When fathers and mothers are in the classics, it makes a great difference.”

Angie then claimed that if you are having problems in homeschooling, it is time to do a Seven Keys Assessment. Go through the Seven Keys she just reiterated and see how you can apply them better.

Angie told a story about working in her garden. She had just planted seeds and was eager to see them grow. She realized that there was nothing she could do to force the plant to grow faster. She said homeschooling children is like gardening. The whole process just takes “Working the principles consistently and persistently even when it is hard.” She then shared the story of a time when she asked a neighbor/farmer for a truckload of manure to use on her garden. As luck would have it, the only time the neighbor could bring it over was when all the older kids and her husband were gone. She the task of shoveling the manure onto her garden fell to her and her little girl. As they were working, her daughter said, “Boy this stuff sure smells bad! Why are we putting it on the garden.” Angie told her it was to help things grow. Angie made an analogy to life in general and thought, “Hey, genius grows from problems or manure!” She suggested that we not say, “If only I didn’t have x problem, things would be so much better.” She said “You have problems to help you become great.”

So what does it take to grow great souls, asked Angie. Three things:

1. Vision
2. Understanding the journey
3. Trusting the process

Ask yourself what you were born to do, and ask what your children were born to do. 

(Here are more of the videos of Ken Robinson.)

http://video.ted.com/assets/player/swf/EmbedPlayer.swf

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